Hard fuckers dating love
Maybe it’s letting insecurity interrupt your happiness, or pushing people away because you’re scared to be vulnerable. Or at least people who don’t behave as though they like you. Next time someone starts treating you like an old bag of milk, instead of making excuses for them, tell them “Hey, don’t do that”. You can’t glue macaroni on a man and call him your boyfriend. They just get mad and make you buy them a new t-shirt.
But I’m betting that giving less of a shit if they tick arbitrary boxes and focusing on how they treat you ends up being a really good move. Maybe it’s giving up on yourself and your own dreams whenever you get into a relationship. I’m just beautiful and smart and you must listen to me.
You're worried your standards are too high, so you figure maybe you should just settle.
I've dated people before who I did not have fun with, I thought they smelled kind of weird, and didn't really respect them as a person, but man, were they ever mean to me!
Because dating is hard, and with the festive season approaching you might be tempted to reach out to all sorts of toxic people. Red flags include: acting indifferently, refusing to make room in their life for you, being kind of rude, or doing odd or unexplained behaviours at you. I don’t know if you’ll be together when the inevitable robot war begins and you’ll get evaporated by lasers together. But also maybe they’re the worst and they’re gonna hurt your feelings and steal your VCR. Stop dating all the exact same person what are just dressed up in slightly different skin bags. So buckle up, celebrate your singularity and make the best of it.
Being cautious when your heart is an enormous hopeful flesh bag is hard. Basically, if you spot anything that in the past has signalled something bad: Don’t ignore it. So practice slowing down, practice managing your expectations, and try to base your hopes on how they act in reality rather than in your most hopeful dreams. If you’ve only ever dated sad poem writing types, why not try dating a happy clam farmer or a folk singer? Don’t romanticize romance, remember that it’s worth waiting for something extraordinary, and then do just that.
You're too lazy to find someone else and you don't want to be alone.
We are all motivated to seek out rewards and avoid punishments (Skinner, 1974).
The men that I speak with (and who commented on my last post) lament about being in a "no win situation" in modern dating.
If they follow what society tells them to do, they often end up "good guys" who are taken advantage of, mistreated, and disrespected.
Life is for doing a bunch of cool stuff and meeting people what make you happy and eating hotdogs in the bath.
Maybe it’s that you keep eating ice cream even though you’re 90 per cent sure you’re lactose intolerant and you’ve had a rash on your tit since July. Which is actually essentially the same thing on account of how liking someone means wanting them to feel good and liked and fixing your behavior to demonstrate that. Except not obviously because we all keep flipping putting up with it. And then withdraw your precious delicious time and energy and refocus it in places that actually produce returns and make you feel good. Same goes for going out with people who aren’t even remotely ready for a relationship and trying to change them into someone who is. Even if it was possible for you to change them into someone who’ll treat you well and return all the energy you’ve poured into them (it’s not but just imagine) I promise you that you don’t have time.
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Truthfully, you know you shouldn't be dating anyone right now but oh god, human contact and oh god, so much crying. It's easier to focus on another person, even if that person blooooows, than to focus on what's really bothering you.